Apr 26

ticketmaster_no_full

 

I just love The Consumerist blog. It’s snarky, fun and to-the-point. But it worried me no end when Consumer Reports bought it. You know, the people who have the temerity to “accept no advertising” but who continue to sell useless “car price information.” These are the people who hawk their magazine shamelessly while being among the very few magazines or newspapers left in the world that do not publish their editorial contacts’ email addresses. CR is happy to tell you what to do. Just don’t bother trying to contact them or, perish the thought, criticize them in any way. (Just ask Bose about that.)

So, when they bought a blog that actually understood the concept of community, I was scared that we’d start seeing the monthly preaching and supercilious editorial content (right next to ads for CR’s overpriced “gift annuity”) that I’ve loved-hated  in the magazine since I was 12. After all, their blogs on consumerreports.org mirror perfectly the printed book’s preachy, holier-than-thou tone. If this was their idea of gettin’ jiggy with the ‘Net, I wasn’t buying it. I thought The Consumerist  would instantly become The Bloviatist.

But I was wrong.

Proof? You say you want proof? Just follow this link. The Consumerist is holding a public vote for the worst company in America. And the two contestants are Citibank and Ticketmaster.  No question for me there. Ticketmaster is the extortionist of the entertainment industry. Their business practices should be legal only in Tehran.

It’s not like it wasn’t close. Tomorrow — April 27, 2009 — is “Alex’s Freedom from Citibank Day.” It’s the day my last CD matures with these…uh…”bankers.” It’s the day that, if my 15 written and phoned requests, blood and DNA samples do the trick, Citibank will cut me a check for my money and mail it to me because that’s the only way they can get it to me. That, despite the fact they were able to transfer the money into the account to buy the CD. It’s the Bank of Kafka — your money goes in…government money goes in…and Gregor Samsa comes out.

But, given that Tickermaster charges a “convenience fee” for what can only be convenient for their bottom line, it’s nolo contendere for my vote. As I wrote this, it was Ticketmaster taking the “prize” 70% to 30%. Go vote…for Ticketmaster. Then, tomorrow, call Citibank and close your accounts there (if you can).

Good on, ya, Consumerist. I hope CR continues to let you live.

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Apr 18

dietdrpepper

All right, so it’s been over a month since I last posted.

I’ve been busy at work and, well, I must say nothing has pissed me off enough to blog.

Still, I care about having a personal blog and keeping it active. The question then becomes: what to say when you are (temporarily) speechless. Writing blog posts takes practice. If you stop for too long, you lose it. I don’t wanna lose it. This blog is a useful way to keep the digital pencil sharp.

Then it struck me: write the kind of post people who really don’t have anything to say write as their best efforts. Just some blog drivel. The internal dialog began:

“Ah, ha! So nothing you’ve ever written on your blog has been dull, witless or banal, eh?”

“I didn’t mean that…how arrogant do you think I am? I just meant that it would be OK for once to write about something nobody could possibly give a shit about just to keep the blog alive and keep the blogging juices flowing.”

“Sure…what you really mean is what you label ‘ordinary’ is what you secretly hope readers of the blog will find humorous, or at least interesting. It’s a head-fake, ain’t it?

“Well, there was once this sitcom that was ostensibly about nothing in particular…”

“And you want to write the blog post equivalent, eh? All under the guise of ‘nothing to say’.”

“You betcha. Wait until all those comments come flowing in…you’ll see.”

So after all that…this blog post is about the fact that I’ve resumed drinking soda after swearing off it since January, 2007. I had a can of the elixir of modern life: Diet Dr. Pepper with my birthday cake yesterday.

Aren’t you thrilled for me? Stay tuned for the blog post wherein I describe what it’s like to drive a BMW M3.

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